As if a night of sitting at home alone doing gay ass homework while my girlfriend is out drinking and having a good time couldn't get any fucking better, I looked at my bank account online tonight to see if I had enough money to buy a 40 of 211 and a pack of cancer stix. Yes I am aware that is very sad, smoking cigarettes and drinking crappy beer by myself, but who the fuck asked you anyway? Back to the bank account thing. As if it wasn't bad enough being broke and jobless, I found out tonight that some fucking retard is rippping me off! Yeeeeaaaaah, someone is stealing my lack of money! Apparently some hack ass fuck has gotten a hold of my account number and has used it on something that is apparently unidentifiable. On my online statement it read "9999xgtCapitalSOL PHON" WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!! GODDAMIT! So I called WAMU customer service and they said that they could not even get a phone number from whoever the fuck "capitalsol" is. Well, fuck me in the goat ass. Apparently it is a fraudulent transaction, they said. Well, no fucking shit dildo breath, I don't have a job and I havent touched my card for a month. Thanks for clearing that up for me. It turns out I have to go into the bank and file a dispute, as well as open a new account. Thank god I have all of this free time to do stupid shit like go to the bank and tell them i did not spend 76 dollars on "capitalsol". Oh, wait, I DONT have any of this "free" time. Turns out I go to school all goddamn day. Oh, wait banks are open late right? Fuck, I really hate banks.
What I hate more is totally fucking braindead criminals. I do not have any idea how some dirtbag got a hold of my account number, but whatever the method was, it had to have some indication on it of how TOTALLY FUCKING POOR I AM. Come on dude, pull your head out of your toothless moms trailer park ass and rip off someone who ACTUALLY HAS MONEY!! Apparently this meth-huffing shit for brains has got the whole "rob the rich, buy crack for the poor" thing all wrong. Jeezuz christ, I had six friggin bucks in my bank account, moron. There has got to be more lucritive crime than getting me for 70 bones that I did not have in the first place. Small wonder these sheep fucking assholes arent CEO's at Apple, or even working at McDonalds. I am sure you could work ad McD's and steal more than 70 bucks out of the till (in cash,which you can actually by drugs with) in a day. The only reason crime is not more prevelant in the US is that only total 'tards decide to live a life ripping people off. Compare the amount of accounts of people getting caught compared to the number of criminal masterminds in history. Do the math, (because I am really bad at math) crooks are inherently stupid.
Ok, now that I am done venting, and this 211 (which I had to buy with FUCKING QUARTERS) is kicking in, I can speak of more positive things. I just got my first article published in the De Anza college newspaper!!! YYYEEAAHHH! And the editors and other writers on the staff actually thought it kicked ass! Yes, I am gloating, but I totally kick ass. My exceptional writing skills have gotten my name published in something like 5,000 people actually read. I will be about as famous as i will ever be in the next two years while I write for La Voz. I would refer you to the La VOz website www.lavozdeanza.com, but the piece of shit does not show all the fucking articles. Fuck you assholes. The world needs to read my articles. If you really want to read my cool ass shit, I will send you a copy of La Voz via snail mail so you could enjoy more of my ramblings. Just email me or gimme your address on my 'book if you are really brave.
Ok, I have to finish my 40oz and punch myself in the face a few times. Have a nice night fuckers.
Liberate yourself. Have sex outside.